Randy Wornhole is a dark and twisted character. Sometimes mischievous, always naughty: queen of goth/fetish campery. Comedian; host; compere; outrageous flirt;

He is the dark creation of Ric Sharples, though who created who is a bone of contention.

“He has always been there in the background, waiting to get out, shouting at very inappropriate moments in my life, its like having comedy touretts. It is very difficult to know where I finish and he begins.” Not a “Drag Queen”, more a plethora of cross-sexual characters with Randy Wornhole at the centre.

He plays host/compere for a variety of events, including: Carnival of Souls twice a year and Club Antichrist in London. His stand-up takes on camp Goth Fetish themes.

BEWARE: He takes prisoners !

Well hello there, Yes its me again Randy Wornhole your host and compere for Carnival Of Souls. Any of you who has met me before will know what I’m about. Any of you who have never come across me before, ( there can’t be many men that haven’t come across me now, well at least come with my assistance anyway). I thought I’d start by answering a few FAQs:

YES: I am gay.
YES: I make all my own costumes/outfits.
YES: I do wear nipple clamps to bed.
NO:  I don’t know Julian Clary.
YES: I am a nymphomaniac!
YES: I do it for money ... Carnival that is!
YES: I have heard of spacetime curvature: The property of spacetime that causes freely falling particles that are initially moving along parallel world lines to subsequently move together or apart. Spacetime curvature and tidal gravity are different names for the same thing.
YES: My Grandad was the actor that played Stan Ogden in Coronation Street.
NO:  My Grandma wasn’t Hilda Ogden!
NO:  I have never been to Doncaster.
YES: I am actually allergic to meat. Yes I know that is awful, especially for a gay man. But its OK, I’m also allergic to fish!

Well that puts the FAQs to bed, yet again. Now down to business. It was a dark and stormy night in the basement lab in Preston when I was brought into the world. Created rather than born. They broke the mould when I was created ... they should have broken the sculptor! At least then there would be no chance of this mistake of genetics to happen again. I’m number 2 son. My older brother is a drag queen in Tenerife. I have been entertaining since being a small child. I am a trained dancer, have been: a percussionist; electrician; cleaner; student; faux straight man; nipple waxer; sexual health worker; retail manager; retail trainer; event and festival organiser. To name but a few.

Now the introduction is over, I thought I’d lay down a few definitions to help you to get the most out of Carnival Of Souls. So here they are:

DEFINITIONS

GOTH: Someone that wears a lot of black, not to be mistaken for priests and nuns. Listens to a certain type of music, sometimes quite melancholy and dark. Pale complexions, but Faaaaabulous make-up. Origins in the Punk style rather a distant cousin, but without the aggression.  Also not to be mistaken with EMO’s.

EMO: No not the bird that used to have Rod Hull’s hand up its arse! Emotionally turbulent, “hard done by”, “not loved by anyone”, hates everyone. Teenagers basically, but with longer hair and eyeliner.

SUN: That big bright thing that is in the sky, behind all the rain clouds. Something to be scared of if you are a pale-skinned goth. If it is totally absent, not  hiding behind a cloud, it means its night time and safe to go out.

FETISH: A fetish is something that gives a person a sexual buzz. Quite often they are things that aren't directly related to sex. I have a fetish for towelling. And I'm embarrassed to say here a fetish for ... no ... it's too warped ... OH well. My name's RANDY WORNHOLE and I have a fetish for ... Chavs lol, yes I know its sick and twisted. Been in therapy for it ... didn't help ... the therapist wore a baseball cap and a tracksuit.

PLAYROOM: The room up the stairs for people that like bottom smacking; being suspended from ropes and chains, (not climbing, same equipment-better clothes).

BONDAGE: having your movement restricted, (not constipation or martial law). Being tide up for fun or sexual gratification. Can be any material: rubber tape; rope; handcuffs; chains; grandma’s head-scarf; old school tie.

Well I hope you found that informative.

See you @ Carnival Of Souls.

Whips and TIGHT hugs’

Randy Wornhole.

http://www.randywornhole.com/

randy.wornhole-comedian@hotmail.co.uk